Spinner's Day Out
by Fenrir's Daughter
Summary: Spinner needs as much of a break from the BF5 as they do from him, so he goes to town to check out the shops and winds up meeting many interesting people. This is the story of his first run-ins with the eccentric townsfolk of Handler's Corners. OCs ahoy!
1. Let's Get This Show on the Road!

A/N: Compared to how long my other stuff's been blocked, this practically wrote itself. Originally, I meant for this to be a onehot, but before I knew it, it was almost ten thousand words! So, I split it into three parts. The next two parts I am still editing, but this should be good! So, here it is, a day in the limelight! Fifteen minutes of fame for our favorite spastic gamer, playful hacker, and all around lovable guy: our very own TijuanaGenius, Spinner Cortez! Part one of three!

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><p>Sherman growled in frustration, unable to stand his brother's presence any longer. "I can't take it anymore! Spinner, <em>please<em> go find something to do. I don't care what, I don't care where! I'm trying to get some work done, so just-just go be somewhere else!"

"All right, jeez, I know when I'm not wanted!" the playful hacker shouted. "See if I even come back this time!"

"EMO!" Sherman accused.

Spinner stormed off in a huff, leaving the hub behind him; some people had no sense of humor. Okay, so maybe he could be a little obnoxious at times, and maybe his pranks occasionally caused some destruction, but there were numerous ways in which he could be worse. Sherman just did not appreciate the lengths to which his brother went for laughs! Spinner worked really hard to keep the team in high spirits—he was not of much other use in battle or in the lab and he knew it, so why bother trying? The best he could do was be the classic comic relief. He had to keep his friends happy and entertained or the stress and angst of their war would get to them—or worse, they would notice how useless he was and get rid of him.

This was patently ridiculous, of course. Vert, Sherman, AJ, Zoom, Agura, Stanford, and maybe even Tezz would give their lives for Spinner. The Battle Force 5 was an extended family and would always look out for each other. But sometimes, just sometimes, Spinner's malicious pranks and bad jokes got excessive enough that even AJ's saint-like patience wore thin. They all loved the little guy but there was only so much they could take!

It had never been easy for Spinner Cortez. He may have been the older brother, but he was never the favorite. He was short and spindly, weak and quirky. His excessive energy drove everyone nuts. He had lied to himself for years that it would all change for the better when he at long last hit his final growth spurt, but deep down he knew he would never be strong and handsome like Sherman.

He would always be small and funny looking. He would always be pathetic and weak and a liability to the team. His abilities were too specialized to make him as useful as everyone else. Spinner bitterly mused that he was essentially there to keep Sherman company and could not even do that right.

What the elder Cortez needed was time to himself, away from all those bad feelings. Spinner needed to get away from the hub and get some fresh air. After a quick stop at Zeke's for a milkshake, Spinner headed towards Totem Corners.

The shops in Totem Corners were kitschy but cozy, and the neighborhood absolutely sang "family." What residential homes there were on those blocks were brightly colored houses built in the style of gold-rush era housing. Spinner could imagine an old-timey general store and a saloon with cowboys wandering down the dusty road in the afternoon sun. But here and now, this was the…well, arts district was not the best term, though that was close. There were gift shops and services, and in a bigger city, the neighborhood would be larger, would probably be called some variant of "The Village," and there would probably be a lot of ethnic minorities, mixed marriages, hippies and homosexuals coexisting in a loving and caring environment. As it was, deep in the south in a blue-collar small town, there were more people of apparently Mexican descent, which made the elder Cortez feel a little less lonely, and some nerdy-looking college types bandying about.

Spinner checked the time: he still had six hours before the September sun went down and he planned to spend all of them in Totem Corners. He figured the best place to start would be the heart of the neighborhood, so he went to the core shops where Totem Avenue met Center Road.

Looking around the crossroads, Spinner decided he would not bother with Wise Raven Occult Books & Supplies until much later, if at all, and that he would put off a visit to Jackalope Sports for as long as possible. What really interested Spinner was the storefront done up in blue and silver, Dragon's Wing Gaming. The small child running around with an elven cloak over his Hawaiian shirt, yelling to himself about a dark wizard and lightning bolts, was all Spinner needed to pluck up his courage. That little kid showcased his weirdness without fear. If he were to find comfort anywhere, this would be the place.

Spinner oftentimes got nervous going to new places, and now was one of those times. Usually he had his brother to comfort him; the silent threat of the gentle giant to keep potential threats at bay. Spinner shook his head. No, he had to be more independent! He had to get used to taking care of himself so he would be less of a liability to the people he cared about. It was time for him to grow up. All he had to do was step across the threshold…

"But the party's still unbalanced," he heard a deep voice complain.

"I…DON'T…**CARE**!" a tall, thin man squawked at his burly companion, his nasally voice inexplicably tainted with the sounds of Brooklyn. "We can't let that asshat back in! He drives me CRAZY!"

"Lloyd's scared away everyone else. Who are we going to get to take his place?"

"Anyone'd be better than _him,"_ the skinny fellow insisted. "You! Hey, you!"

Spinner backpedaled towards the store, looking around frantically. "Who, me?" he asked dumbly, pointing to himself.

"I don't see nobody else here, so I must be talkin' to you," the thin guy said aggressively. "How much you know about Dungeons & Dragons?"

"Th-the roleplaying game? Uh, I, um, why do you ask?"

"Would you stop that? Look, now you scared him, idiot." The big guy lightly punched his friend in the arm. "You'll have to excuse Tag; he's…excitable. I'm Bink, by the way."

He shook the offered hand, still wary, despite the strong, broad young man's apparent pleasantness. "Lemme guess; weird childhood nicknames you never got rid of?"

The thin guy—Tag, apparently—scowled. "You got a problem with that?"

"Not at all. Spinner Cortez, nice to meet you."

"Spinner? Really?" Tag chuckled. "Suddenly, it's nice to meet you, too."

Tag and Bink smiled warmly and there were handshakes all around.

"Can I spot 'em or can I spot 'em? He's one of us!"

Spinner looked at Tag questioningly. "One of what now?"

"The nerd herd, clearly. I mean, you _were_ just about to walk into the Dragon's Wing, right?"

"Spinner, I would like to make you a proposition," Bink asked, that same calm, observant expression on his face. "Tag and I are involved in a longstanding DND campaign that we would like to see through to its conclusion. The problem is that one of the guys we brought in a few months back was the ultimate douchebag—narcissistic, controlling, whiny, not enough personality to fill a paper bag but still enough of an asshole to think he's the boss."

"Yeah, and ugly to boot!" Tag added.

"And worst of all, he tried to play a lawful good Drow."

"Well, that's pretty popular right now with the Dr'zzzt books," Spinner contended.

"Without writing a backstory beyond 'He is totally awesome,'" Bink amended.

"The arrogant fiend!"

Tag grinned excitedly. "Exactly! That's why we voted Lloyd out, and the dungeon master was glad to get rid of him! But now we're one guy short, see, and Lloyd's bullied and annoyed anyone who would play with us into staying away."

"Would you like to play with us, Spinner?" Bink asked. "You'd be doing us a big favor."

Spinner stroked his chin thoughtfully. "I dunno. I've got limited experience with tabletop rpgs. Usually I focus on video games… It could be an opportunity to make new friends, though. How often do you guys meet?"

Tag and Bink quickly gave Spinner the rundown: their group met in the open gaming area at Dragon's Wing Gaming every other Sunday night at seven-thirty, and tonight was one of those nights. Game sessions were run in DND 3.5 with some Pathfinder rules and few rules from earlier editions mashed in that made for an intuitive and entertaining set of house rules. Sessions typically ran until eleven, though they had accidentally stayed up until two a couple of times. The guy who owned the game shop was the DM, and he occasionally allowed his young son to help with villains and obstacles; his son was apparently the weird little kid in the cape Spinner had seen earlier. Tag played a wiry Human Barbarian, all speed and rage. Bink's character was a Dwarven Ranger, which was unusual, but his backstory was amazingly detailed and the DM had allowed it. Unfortunately, this seeming lenience on character creation had led to Lloyd showing his true colors, i.e. his attempt at a lawful good Drow Paladin of Pelor…a _dark elf knight of a sun god._ Aside from Tag and Bink, there were still two other players: the DM's wife, who owned the comic book store, dropped in from time to time when they needed an Elven Sorceress for backup, but this was infrequent and only when the planned adventure required more magic; and Tag and Bink's friend who played a Halfling Rogue, but their friend was a steady party member who never missed a game.

Spinner hummed. "With a ranger to cover us in the woods, and since he's a dwarf, in dungeons, a rogue to open doors and a barbarian to—well, no offense, Tag, but a barbarian to do stupid shit—"

"Oh, none taken. I _specialize_ in stupid shit!" Tag chirped enthusiastically.

"You guys sound pretty much covered to me."

"Except for our lack of a serious healer. We need a cleric in a bad way." Bink's features were grim. "You don't have to decide right away, but pop by Dragon's Wing around seven to see if Strider's given the go ahead. He's pretty wary about new people after Lloyd, so we're going to need some time to butter him up. You might want to avoid the shop for a while."

Spinner sighed. "Aww, but that's over five hours away. I wanted to check out the game store _now…"_

"We'll give you a guided tour when you get back," Bink promised.

"There's always Coyote Comics," Tag called over his shoulder. "See ya 'round, buddy!"

Spinner watched his new acquaintances disappear into the game shop. Sure, he had an invitation to hang out this evening, maybe, but what was he supposed to do until then? Well, Tag had suggested the comic book store, and that did seem like an equally fun place to be for a geek like him.

Spinner loved video games, it was true. But under his bed was a catalogued and well organized collection of some of the best adventures of his preferred fictional heroes. He had all the greats; Batman, the X-Men—even a little Wonder Woman here and there, though he would be unwilling to admit to that. By far, however, his absolute favorite was Spider-Man. Spinner was always anxious to see what the wisecracking Peter Parker was getting up to.

The inside of Coyote Comics was cozy, the high shelves behind the counter lined with action figures. The carpet was the same shade of green…_and texture…_as Oscar the Grouch's fur, the walls were paneled in a dark wood, and every inch of the locked glass display case was filled with old-school Star Trek phasers and more action figures. Spinner even spotted an impressive looking Klingon Bat'leth on the wall.

'_Sherman would love this place,'_ he thought, then shook his head and frowned. Of course, Spinner felt silly for snapping at his little brother earlier, but Sherman was probably still mad at him. He figured he should probably give him some time to cool off.

As he was browsing the collection, Spinner noticed a distinctive character featured prominently on the covers of several issues on the shelf; there was apparently a new Vlador's Quest miniseries ongoing from IDK Entertainment. Sherman was a _huge_ fan of Vlador's Quest and loved watching reruns of the show, as well as watching the original British version now that Stanford had alerted him to it. Maybe if Spinner got the comics for him he would not be as upset with him! Spinner snatched up the three issues that were currently on the shelf and headed for the front desk. He had barely been there for fifteen minutes, but he only had #1, #3 and #4. He wanted to know if any other parts were available and figured the woman at the front desk would know.

Of course, that day being unusual as it was, Spinner's ears were soon turning red at the conversation he inadvertently eavesdropped on.

"I've said it before and I'm not afraid to say it again!" she shouted in the second New York accent he had heard that day. Her wild hair swung about her head, curls and waves flaring like a wolf raising its hackles. "If Gene Roddenberry felt that Kirk and Spock are 'just friends' then why would he take all that trouble and create the Vulcan word T'hy'la to mean friend/brother/lover? Being the intelligent and open minded man he was, Roddenberry must have intended for them to be in a relationship but unable to be open about it due to the censors. Otherwise, he was smart enough to allow the fans to choose which meaning was best suited to their own interpretation!"

Zeke from the diner glared back at the feisty brunette, raising his own voice in protest. "Girl, you need to keep your mind out of the gutter! James Tiberius Kirk was a lover of many different beings, but none of them were male! He and Spock were closer than friends, but what you're suggestin' is just ridiculous!"

"I'm not pulling things out of my ass to make this exist, Zeke. There's enough empirical evidence to suggest a romantic relationship. If Roddenberry didn't mean for them to be lovers he coulda just denied it, but instead he danced around it in his little dance of ultimate vagueness! Therefore I must conclude wholeheartedly that Kirk and Spock share a forbidden love that dare not speak its Spork-y name!"

Zeke looked as if he were about to shout at her some more, but suddenly decided against it. The old man raised his hands in a placating gesture. "You're crazy. Why do I even bother arguing?"

"Because you love me like a daughter and enjoy our spirited debates?" she asked, making puppy-dog eyes at him. "And because I have an original printing of Detective Comics #5 that you want to get your hands on?"

"That too," he said. Zeke smiled and shook his head. "Same time Wednesday, Lupita?"

"Same as every week, Zeke!"

The pretty brunette who was indeed called Lupita, according to her name tag, waved goodbye to the old man, then gestured for Spinner to approach the counter. Her over-excited energy calmed somewhat, though she watched him with collie-like attention and a friendly smile. "How can I help you, sweetie?" she asked, tilting her head like an inquisitive hound.

"Um, do you have issue #2 of Vlador's Quest?"

"I'm sorry, hon, I just sold the last copy."

"Oh. Okay…"

"But they'll be sending the next printing with a new variant cover on Wednesday, as well as the first printing of the next issue!" she happily yapped, flashing her teeth at Spinner.

"Oh!" he enthused. "Oh, that's awesome! I'll totally be here. That is, umm, if you'll be here? What time are you open that day?"

"Coyote Comics will be opening at eleven in the morning on Wednesday and close at seven in the evening, same as every other day. However, what makes Wednesday more special is that is indeed new comic book day! Oh, fraptious day, calloo-calliegh, rapture! Is there any day more glorious than new comic book day? I ASK YOU!"

"Uh, n-no, no day more glorious. You're absolutely right." Spinner looked around shiftily, momentarily concerned by the shopkeeper's outburst. He continued shopping for a while, finally settling on a team-up involving Spider-Man and some chick named Squirrel Girl that looked completely hilarious. Of course, for Sherman, he still grabbed the three issues of Vlador's Quest in the hopes it would make a decent apology present. Finally, the spastic gamer returned to the counter, ready to go.

"So, Tag and Bink say you're married to the dude who owns the gameshop?"

"Yeah," she said, smiling dreamily. "Strider's the greatest. You see that Bat'leth on the wall?"

Spinner examined the wickedly sharp exotic weapon mounted behind her and nodded.

"He hand forged it himself as an engagement gift."

"You sound like you really love him."

"Wouldna had his kid if I didn't." She sighed. "Oh, you wouldn't expect someone so strong and handsome to be such a colossal geek, but of course I hit the jackpot. Ye gods and furry creatures, he's _perfect_ and he's mine."

Spinner smiled wistfully. It was so nice to see a happy couple when his own life was so full of violence and strife. It gave him hope. "I'm not from around here, so I could be wrong, but that accent of yours doesn't sound native."

"Strider and me moved down here from Buffalo, New York."

"You like it here?"

"Oh, yeah! Handler's Corners is so quiet and safe!"

Spinner smirked at the ridiculousness of this statement, knowing the peril the town was put in with every storm shock that opened. Lupita, for her part, took no notice.

"Good school system, too. Great place to raise our munchkin. What about you, uh…?"

"Spinner," he said, shaking her hand. "I like Handler's Corners, don't get me wrong, but sometimes I really miss Albuquerque."

"Oh, no kiddin? My Ma's from Albuquerque! Listen, kid, you need anything, you let me know, awright? Small towns can be tough on outsiders. We gotta stick together."

"Thanks, Lupita!" he said as he went out the door. "Take care!"

Well, that had been interesting. And here, Spinner thought he was only outgoing when he had his brother to protect him. Already today he had met three more of the cast of characters that made up this quaint little town, and all had been friendly to him. How wonderful! And what a nice time he was having! But, oh, if only the time would go faster! For he was not supposed to go to the game shop for quite a few hours yet, as it was barely past three. There was the possibility of going down either Center Road or Totem Avenue to see some other places, but Spinner almost felt as if he would be cheating if he did not at least check out the four main shops at the center. He could not go to the game shop and had already been to the comic book store, so that left Jackalope Sports and Wise Raven Occult Books & Supplies. Neither appealed strongly, but he did have time to kill. Spinner glanced towards the bookstore.

Had the sky not been totally clear a moment ago? Why did such a foreboding shadow drip down the stucco outer walls? The gnarled, dead trees that surrounded the building poked their sharp, petrified branches into the sky, threatening to crack under the weight of an enormous flock of crows. The huge black birds all seemed to be staring intently at Spinner as he backed away in unease. Also, the shop was creepy.

Spinner turned tail in fright and went quickly into the cheery looking sporting goods store, passing by the mounted head of a jackrabbit with antlers. AJ's birthday was coming up in a month or so and he would probably like something crazy and dangerous.


	2. Strange Things Afoot

A/N: Part two! Read and review! Me no own, you no sue! LOL, I rhyme. Srsly, though, here's Spinner's adventures continuing.

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><p>Ulysses Grant Cortez, known as Spinner due to his love of all kinds of games that had begun early in life, was not exactly the athletic type. He was in good enough shape to run away from just about anything and he was pretty quick, but he was not strong or a good fighter. He did not lift weights, he did not snowboard, and he did not box or wrestle. He had the lean body of a runner and would have been great at track and field if participating in extracurricular sports had ever interested him but they never had, and probably never would. Spinner just was not a physical sort of guy.<p>

But AJ Dalton? He loved the exertion offered by these extreme activities, loved pushing himself to the limits. Spinner knew that if he was going to get an awesome gift for AJ's birthday, he would most likely find it here. Though he had to admit his knowledge was limited, the equipment and accessories seemed extensive.

"Guten tag!" a voice sang in a resounding tenor, and Spinner laid eyes on a tall, strong man with dark eyes and a twitchy little button nose. "Und how are you today, mien freund? I am Chet Wolpertinger. How can I help you today?"

"Chet?" Spinner asked, backing into a shelf lined with fingerless gloves and bicycle locks even as the muscular foreigner in the tight shirt enclosed on his personal space. "That's not a very German sounding name."

"Oh, ja," he said sheepishly. "But people tend to look at you strangely ven you tell zem your name is Adolf. So I change it ven I come to America!"

"Yeah, heheh, that sounds reasonable… I was just looking around for a present for my friend, see, he's really into base jumping and luge and pretty much anything extreme. Um. Well."

"Sie sind liebenswert," Chet rumbled seductively, giving Spinner an adorable smile. The spastic gamer had no idea what this big German guy wanted with him or what he was saying, but he knew he had to get the hell out of there. "I'm sure we can find something. Now, vhat can you tell me about your friend, hmm?"

"W-well AJ's from the Yukon—"

"Oh, ist so cold up there!"

"He really likes the cold, though. It's tough for him staying here because it gets so hot."

"Something he can do at night, then, when der air ist cooler." Chet hummed thoughtfully. "How about rock climbing? There are cave systems running near the gorge, und even a few abandoned mineshafts. Dark, dank, cold even during der day—spooky, though, not somewhere to go alone." He paused and grinned, putting an arm around Spinner. "Of course, der seclusion ist lovely if you have someone cute to share it with…"

Spinner swallowed hard, fear wracking every nerve in his body. The playful hacker was about to yell that he needed an adult to save him from this buck-toothed creep, but he was suddenly saved as another employee called Chet over.

"Hey, boss man! Little help here?"

"Just a minute, Mitchell, mein freund."

The voice whined. "Boss, c'mon, this is too heavy for me and the UPS guy says he needs to talk to you!"

"Ach, faul Amerikaner," he muttered, wandering off. Spinner sighed in relief at this temporary reprieve.

"Psst, dude," someone whispered at him. Spinner observed a scrawny, awkward-looking guy with a bucket hat over his messy red hair. "Escape while you can, little dude. He's only going to get worse."

"H-h-he can't be that bad, right?"

Mitchell eyed him skeptically. "You know all those things they say about Germans being kinky and weird? They're all true, dude, especially about _East_ Germans. Now, _run."_

Chet walked back over when he was done, whistling cheerily. "Now, liebschen, what do you think?" He looked about for the cute little fellow who had been so nervous and sweet, but Chet saw no one. "Liebschen? Where are you hiding, liebschen?"

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><p>Spinner was not huffing and puffing from exertion—he had needed to run further than this from scarier guys than that. No, Spin was having a panic attack. The spastic gamer was not homophobic, no, far from it. Some of his best friends were gay. But the big, tough German was coming on far too strong and did not seem like the type to take no for an answer. It was for his very wellbeing; not sheer homophobia he mentally insisted, but for his own safety. The world was a dangerous place and rape could happen to anyone, even the goofy-looking guy who could not get a date. This was why Spinner had run full-tilt across the street into the occult shop and was now cowering below the heavy drapes that kept the storefront so dim.<p>

Momentarily, he overcame his fright to peer out the window; the man who had introduced himself as Chet Wolpertinger had stepped outside to search up and down the street, a hurt expression on his face. He ran a hand through his mousy brown, shoulder length locks and sighed, his eyes forlorn. Spinner almost felt sorry for running out like that, but he rationalized his panic as he watched him go back into the shop.

"Don't get fingerprints on my window," he heard an annoyed voice squawk.

Spinner jumped three feet into the air, his adrenaline still spiking, and rammed his shoulder painfully into a sturdy wooden shelf. A crystal ball went flying across the room and his hands shot out just in time to catch it. Relieved, he let out a shuddering breath and slowly looked over the woman who now glared at him.

She was pushing fifty and her nose jutted out from her gaunt face at an angle that suggested less of a nose and more of a beak, but it did not make her ugly so much as it just made her interesting. She might have even been pretty if she were not so thin. But as it was, this was a woman who had been the skinny, awkward, plain-Jane in high school and had never truly grown out of it. She wore too much silver and turquoise jewelry over her billowing black dress, but though she somewhat resembled the Wicked Witch of the West she had held on to what good looks she had. Spinner had definitely seen uglier women who were younger than her, but she was not _particularly_ attractive. The frown lines on her dark, red skin were deeply ingrained from a lifetime of disappointment and showed themselves clearly as she scowled down at him.

"Be careful!" she screeched. "You break it, you bought it."

Spinner nodded respectfully, backing away and slowly continuing up the aisle to the back of the store. This woman had a presence about her; maybe he was just being superstitious, but he _was_ in an occult shop. If he had been inclined to believe in witches, Spinner would have thought for sure the woman here fit the bill.

The spastic gamer tread lightly, inspecting the books on each shelf carefully. There were non-threatening titles like "Wicca for the Solitary Practitioner" and "Bounty of the Mother Goddess" and some new-age music and chanting on CD. There were eagle feathers and quartz crystals, carved wooden statuettes, books on the religious practices of different Native American tribes and ancient pagans of Europe and Africa. Even a text that mentioned the Order of the Flying Fist from whence his friend Zoom hailed! But further into the store Spinner noticed the books and items were becoming a little more suspect. Texts on the 'Burning Times'—as followers of pagan religions called the great witch hunts—were more prominently displayed, but so were books on demonology. There were more skulls in this section than there had been in previous ones and more of the candles were black. The herbs that hung drying from the ceiling even had more sinister names and if he remembered correctly a number of them were poisonous.

Spinner picked up and examined a dagger whose blade was shaped in a flowing wave; the blade was sharp and the handle was encircled by an ornately carved snake. Spinner glanced behind him, keenly aware of sharp, golden eyes observing him over the top of a book; the old woman watched him like a hawk, thinking he was looking to shoplift. He put down the blade and turned to leave empty handed, but what he saw out of the corner of his eye made him do a double take. He stopped dead in his tracks.

Between the two shelves that framed the back wall, hanging there on that surface, was the most hideous painting he had ever had the misfortune to view. It was not poorly composed, no, far from it; the brushwork and attention to detail was incredible. It was just, well…_creepy:_ Lightning streaked through the black sky. Water flooded across a desert floor, destroying everything in its wake, and over this landscape loomed a horrific, slime-green figure with rubbery rolls of fat on its hulking yet oddly humanoid form, topped by an octopus where a head should have been. Tentacles reared up, tightly curled around cars and screaming people to show his gaping maw. Green, draconic wings framed the greedy, flabby figure, and clawed hands dragged the whole of a small town—Handler's Corners—toward the horrible monster. In the foreground was a man in a black suit who looked like he was attempting to dive to safety, but upon closer inspection, Spinner realized there was no way it could have been a normal human man. For one thing, it had no face, and its limbs were too long and spidery for its body. The thing was wearing a black suit and a red tie, but it was diving after an adolescent, its clawed fingers scraping down the boy's face. The boy strongly resembled Vert, and it made Spinner shiver.

"Terrifying, isn't it?" she rasped. She grinned when Spinner fell screaming to the ground, laughing and smirking at his nervous fear. "Janet Wheeler completed this painting two weeks before she was incarcerated at Brush Hollow. I was lucky enough to buy it at a garage sale just after her son got out of foster care."

"W-wheeler?"

"Yes, a local artist," she said, smiling sadly as she looked again at the picture. "Janet was a tough girl from a military family, but so passionate and emotional. She loved her husband more than anything... And when he disappeared, she went mad with grief, becoming obsessed with tarot cards and other forms of divination to try and find him. She was paranoid, believing first that a member of the sheriff's department was stalling the investigation for a chance at a romance with her, and eventually that one of the deputies was responsible for his Jack's disappearance. She took the man hostage and attempted to kill him. Anyone else would have been sent up the river, but she was raving and delusional. She thought she had been to another world and that a creature she called the 'Slender Man' had helped her escape an ancient evil squid god. Some people in town even think Janet killed her husband in a rage, and the guilt was what drove her mad. But a body was never recovered and the case is still open."

The shopkeeper's face became grim once more. "In the end they locked her in the madhouse and sent her son to live with relatives in California. I believe the Wheeler boy is back in town now, managing his father's garage, all alone. It's all so very tragic."

"Oh, Vert," Spinner keened, covering his mouth. Tears were welling up in his eyes. Vert never talked about his mother, _ever,_ and Spinner had assumed she was dead.

Her eyebrows rose up to her hairline in surprise. "You know Vert Wheeler?" she asked incredulously. "Ay, he wouldn't like that I told you that story. You mustn't tell him. He's been through so much already."

"Not a word," Spinner promised, still trying not to cry. To think one of his best friends had been living with this horrible story in their background and had never vented it to anyone…

"But, perhaps you could give him a message from me?" she asked gently. "Janet often came to my shop when she missed her husband. I comforted her as best as I could and she came to trust me. She left a few things with me for safe keeping. Could you perhaps ask him to come see Maria Wise Raven at her shop? I would ask him myself, but I am sure he would not appreciate an unsolicited visitor at the garage, so…"

"Yes, of course. I'll tell him as soon as I see him."

"Oh, thank you," she said, sighing with relief. "Thank you for helping out an old woman, dear. Here, pick out something from the jewelry rack, on the house."

"That's all right; I really don't want to impose."

"I _insist."_

There was something that sounded like a command in her voice, and he felt compelled to obey. Reluctantly, Spinner picked out a silver pentacle with blue rhinestones on each of the five. His incredibly Catholic grandmother would have a fit if she knew he would consider owning such a thing. With a polite goodbye, Spinner departed the store, emotionally drained. Modern logic or no, this woman—this Maria Wise Raven—was definitely a witch.

Spinner's stomach growled and he took that as his cue to look for dinner.

The hacker did not relish the idea of seeing any of the Battle Force 5 at that moment, scared he would burst into tears the moment he saw Vert's face. Zeke's was not an option. He would instead look for someplace else. There were few other choices in such a small town, but fortunately Spinner was in the right area to find such a place. Totem Corners was full of different little curiosities and right up the street was Lucky Panda Chinese.

He hoped a little beef lo mein would cheer him up; Spinner just felt like sitting in the same spot for an hour and eating as much as he could with no one to talk to. But he had the feeling the mental images from that evil painting would dull his appetite. The little boy screaming as the claws scratched across his face, the faceless man in the black suit who looked so familiar, the huge rubbery tentacles that raked across town and rent asunder everything in their path…

'_No calamari for me, thanks,'_ he thought, shaking his head. But before he could quite make it to the door of the restaurant, Spinner was pulled away by his wrist.

"Hey, there, pal, how are you?"

The young man who had accosted him was only a little taller than Spinner, a little on the scrawny side, with brown hair and brown eyes, and otherwise plain to the point of being nondescript. He had no style whatsoever. From the vacant look in his eyes, Spinner was also fairly certain he was unimaginative and not very bright. Worst of all was the unsettling, fake smile on his face. "Do I know you?" he asked, grabbing his hand away.

"No, but boy, should you ever. I'm Lloyd, Lloyd Carter." Spinner blanched as his hand was grabbed again and forcibly shook; this was the smug idiot Tag and Bink had warned him about. "I don't think I've ever seen you around here before, friend. Don't remember you from my school days, either. Say, are you new in town?"

"Been living in Handler's Corners almost two years, but this is the first time I've ever been to Totem Corners. I've just been so busy with work—"

"Taking care of business, I see, I see, very responsible of you." He put an arm around Spinner, trying to lead him towards the alley. "Don't worry, guy, I'll show you the ropes. There's a lot of cool stuff to do, but there are some people you've got to watch out for, and I'll be able to show you who to avoid. Francis Mario Castelucci, also known as Tag, for example, once got a little too obsessed with Team Fortress 2 and hit a guy with a baseball bat for hacking his Steam account. Then we've got James Riley Ford, also known as Bink; big guy, strong and silent type, break your legs for looking at him cross-eyed. Those two guys? Bad news. You should never play Dungeons & Dragons with them. Ever."

His earlier assessment of 'not very bright' was insufficient. This guy was about as subtle as a flying mallet. He went straight for character defamation, not even bothering with actually trying to gain Spinner's trust before badmouthing Tag and Bink.

Spinner twisted out of Lloyd's grip, pushing him away. "If you think you can bully me out of that campaign, you're either crazy or an idiot. I take my gaming very seriously and I won't be tricked by a jerk like you."

Lloyd's features darkened as he grabbed Spinner's left arm and twisted it around, holding it above his head so the gamer was pulled off his feet. Spinner hissed in pain, forced to look into Lloyd's empty, soulless eyes.

"Listen, you little punk," he said, his tone calm and even; that godforsaken smile was still on his face. "I was in the game for months—_months._ I was very emotionally invested in the story. Sure, the group had a little falling out, but I'll convince them to take me back once you're out of the way. You think you matter to Tag and Bink? That they wouldn't throw you out like they did me? You're less than nothing to them, just a warm body to roll the dice."

"Let me go!" Spinner shouted. "Somebody help!"

"I'm getting back in that game and no one's going to stop me, especially not a little weasel like you."

Finally, the gamer's struggle bore fruit as he broke Lloyd's grasp, turning to punch that loser right in the mouth. As Lloyd cried out and fell to his knees, Spinner turned and ran. He went right into Lucky Panda for dinner, never looking back. Of course, because he never looked back, Spinner neither saw Lloyd get dragged into an alley, nor by whom he was dragged. Spinner only knew he was pissed off and hungry and his right hand hurt like the dickens. He was having a rough time and deserved a nice meal to help settle his nerves.

Tezz and AJ had raved about this place, but it was only just now that Spinner got a chance to try out there cuisine. It was a noisy little place, busy as all get out, with a menu that made his spiked head spin. When the cute waitress came over, he could tell from her accent that she was fresh off the boat, and he realized that it was probably a family operation that brought relatives away from the oppressive regime that was the People's Republic of China whenever they could afford to. Spinner placed his order and ate in peace, his time there relatively uneventful. He spoke to no one at first, only watching others as they ate, gossiped and left. There was one noisy little old man shouting in Cantonese at another old man large enough to be a sumo wrestler. The big old guy did not seem overly vexed, responding slowly and calmly in the same language. The skinny old man sulked, muttering as he went back to the kitchen.

The waitress brought Spinner some ice for his sore knuckles while he waited, and that was when the prodigiously large man noticed him. He looked as if he would tower head and shoulders above Sherman and this height, combined with his thick limbs and the measure of his gut, made for quite an impressive figure. Spinner swallowed nervously as the Kingpin lookalike waddled over to his table, gently picking up his injured hand.

"You punch wrong," he said simply in his deep baritone.

"Huh?"

"You punch wrong. You hurt yourself, dummy. See? Your hand cut up." His broken English spoke truthfully about the condition of Spinner's injured right hand; the boy had skinned a knuckle on Lloyd's tooth.

The hacker thought it odd that a Chinese restaurant would have such high quality bandages on hand, unaware of the quasilegal fights that took place in the basement, but he did not complain. The old man, who introduced himself as Mr. Po, cleaned and bandaged the boy's hand and then proceeded to teach Spinner how to throw a proper punch. Now if he ran into Lloyd again, he could take the prick down without hurting himself.

Too many crab rangoons and lo mein noodles later, the elder Cortez was feeling peachy-keen. That loser, Lloyd, must have gotten the hint, he figured, since his dinner had gone uninterrupted. Well-fed and ready to go, he walked out of the restaurant and unwrapped his fortune cookie.

'_Fortune smiles upon you. Accept the next proposition you hear.'_


	3. Homecoming

A/N: Final chapter! I realize now that I've posted it that this hasn't been that great. I had all these OCs I needed to get out there and I kinda forced them on you guys in a shitty attempt at a screwball comedy...if anyone is even reading this. I mean, there hasn't been a single review. I guess Spinner really doesn't have any fans out there. Well, that's too bad. Because I happen to like Spinner enough that the next story I'm working on is something uber serious and angst ridden, centering all around him. Actually, the next TWO things I'm working on could be described as that. Oh well! I guess he's an acquired taste, like spinach.

Spinner: Hey! I am WAY tastier than Spinach!

**EDIT: Changed the name of the iguana for an added joke.**

* * *

><p>Spinner scoffed at the absurdity of the advice the little slip of paper offered him, thinking of all the idiotic things that could happen if he complied. He could get hooked on drugs or sucked into a Ponzi scheme! Why would anyone accept any kind of proposal without doing a little research? Spinner crumpled the fortune and stuck it in his pocket, laughing. How ridiculous.<p>

Of course, there was still the matter of how to spend the next two hours until he was to arrive at Dragon's Wing Gaming. He was full and did not feel like visiting Honeybee Sweets Unlimited, though he filed away the location for future reference. Canary Diamonds would be of little use to him, as he was not looking to get engaged any time soon. Hummingbird Floristry was likewise not on his list of places he could get anything interesting—though if he ever managed to get a date, knowing where the shop was would be useful. Walking down a side street, Spinner noticed a dark alley. The sun would not be going down for almost three hours, so it was curious that said alley should be so dark, but somehow Spinner felt compelled to at least glance in, if only to see what was down it. Cautiously he peered around the corner.

To his right was what appeared to be a night club, or possibly just your average blue-collar bar, which the blinking neon sign declared to be The Tipsy Roadrunner. In either case, Spinner was only nineteen, not old enough to drink, so he did not really care. But on his left, across the alley from the bar, was The One-Horned Stag. The outside of the storefront was relatively plain. In point of fact, it was oddly plain, with no displays in the windows but rather many printed signs, almost as if they were trying to be modest. Spinner was unsure whether he wanted to go in at first, but no one was around. No one was standing in front of the bar or looking out the darkened glass at this place. Still, he felt embarrassed by all the signs marked "XXX" and "ADULTS ONLY." The rest of the BF5 would be catcalling and jeering if they knew he was here.

But…they did not know. And they did not have to find out, either…

Casually looking around to see the coast was still clear, Spinner strolled as nonchalantly as possible towards the store and crossed the threshold. Time for a little adventure!

_Gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight  
>Won't somebody help me chase the shadows away?<br>Gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight  
>Take me through the darkness to the break of the day<em>

The gorgeous blonde behind the counter stopped dancing and perked up when she heard the door chime signal his approach. "Hi there, sugar," she said breathily, smiling and fluttering her long lashes at her new customer. "I'm Bambi. Are you looking for anything in particular?"

"No, just browsing," Spinner blurted, blushing furiously. Of course there had to be a boner-inducing beautiful girl working here, knowing why he had come in, and knowing what he wanted. God, this was so embarrassing! At least if it had been just some guy he could have just not looked him in the eye the whole time and ignored him, but this chick was so hot she made Meagan Fox look like a big, fat, slobbering pig! On the verge of a panic attack, Spinner kept his head down, refusing to meet her gaze out of mortification.

Bambi, for her part, seemed oblivious. "Okay then. Just let me know if you need anything, sugar."

Spinner blushed more deeply at the pet name. Well, he had been vaguely interested in a nudey-mag or something, but in hindsight, getting one's porn via the internet and keeping it in an encrypted file on a portable hard drive had much less potential for humiliation. There was no way he could get up the nerve to actually purchase anything here, not with the counter being manned by that hottie. But now Spinner could not leave…because she was _watching_ him.

Spinner gulped, nervous. She was _totally_ judging him for a pervert, or worse, a shoplifter. Or even worse than that, a _perverted shoplifter! _She smiled at him, and he imagined she knew he was ashamed. She licked her lips, and Spinner looked away, blushing again as she giggled. But what really got under his skin was when she walked towards him, swaying her hips to the disco playing over the radio and still smiling sweetly. She looked him up and down, murmuring approval, and the gamer became decidedly confused.

This did not compute. If she had acted this way with anyone else, even another _girl,_ Spinner would have automatically assumed she was flirting. But people just did _not_ flirt with Spinner Cortez! Least ways, pretty girls he would actually be interested in, and _especially_ not random hot chicks with epic tits and legs for miles. Nervously he smiled and feebly raised his hand in greeting.

"You're such a cute little thing," she cooed in that soft and breathy voice. "So, tell me, sugar, what's your name?"

"S-Spinner."

"Spinner? Oh, that's adorable!" She giggled again. "You don't have to be so self-conscious, Spinner. It's only me and you here. So, are you looking for something to surprise your girlfriend?"

"Oh, no, I, um…I don't have a girlfriend."

"Boyfriend, then?"

"NO! Uh, not that there's anything wrong with that. I mean, um."

Bambi smiled innocently. "Hey, I don't judge. Come on, there's got to be someone you were thinking about. You don't strike me as the type to be into toys, if you know what I mean."

"No. There's no one," Spinner said sadly.

"Aw, really? A cute little fella like you?" Bambi reached out a hand to curl a piece of Spinner's hair around her finger. "If that's the case then I've got half a mind to snatch you up myself."

There was no denying it, no matter how down on himself he was. This girl was flirting with Spinner. Maybe Bambi had an ulterior motive, maybe she was planning to rob him or something, but she seemed genuinely nice. She did not come off as predatory, like Chet at the sporting goods store, or AJ's ex, Mrs. Robinson. She was sweet and bubbly, like a ditzy cheerleader. For the first time he could remember, Spinner was not utterly terrified that someone seemed interested in him. On the contrary, he was flattered. This girl was beautiful, and apparently sane.

'_Then again, maybe she's not.'_

Spinner sighed miserably. She did not seem exactly the type you would bring home to meet the folks. He had his duties as a member of the Battle Force 5 to think of and Bambi did not come off as very smart. His team's secret would be in danger. "Thank you for the compliment. You seem really nice," he said. "But I'm not really looking for a relationship right now."

This time, she did not giggle.

Bambi snorted with incredulous laughter. "A girl working in a sex shop is nice to you, and you think she's looking for a _relationship?"_ The bubbly blonde cracked up in a most unladylike manner, holding her sides. "Oh, god, you are just _precious!_ Ha!"

"Jeez, thanks for the boost to my self-esteem, lady," Spinner muttered darkly.

"Sugar, no," she soothed, calming down. "What I meant is that I don't do 'relationships.' I just thought we could have a little fun."

The gamer's eyebrows shot up in shock. "Are…are you _propositioning_ me?" he asked, suddenly remembering the fortune cookie. _"Me?"_

"Why not?" she asked with a shrug. "You're here, you're cute, and I've always had a thing for sweet little guys. When the other girls were trying to date football players, I was banging the chess team. And the science club. And the mathletes. Do you see where I'm going with this? Because I loves me some nerds." She was playing with his hair again. "How about it, sugar? You game?"

Spinner swallowed nervously. "I'm not so sure about this. I'm… I mean, I've never…y'know…"

"You're a virgin?" She took Spinner's blushing to mean she was correct and clapped her hands together, squealing with delight. "That's perfect! I can teach you everything! I really know what I'm doing, too. This is going to be so much fun!"

"Uh, you sure you won't be disappointed, Bambi?" Spinner asked, watching giddily as she locked the door and flipped the open sign to closed. "If I'm, um, not that great?"

"Well, if that happens then we'll just have to keep trying until you get it right," she said, her voice a husky whisper. "Unless you had other plans?"

Spinner weighed his options. On the one hand, there was a chance this might be a bad idea. On the other hand, the chance of it being a bad idea was very small and almost every part of Spinner—including a _very_ important one—said that this was a very, very _good _idea.

The elder Cortez shrugged and grinned. "Well, I've got an appointment at seven-thirty, but my schedule's clear until then."

"Oh, that's plenty of time!"

"All right!"

Spinner found a whole new world in this girl he had never met, this blonde bombshell named Bambi. Yes, their first time around had not exactly lasted long, but she kept her word, and they went at it again. She was the eager gatekeeper to his clueless keymaster, the rampaging Godzilla to his unsuspecting Tokyo. She showed him things he had never dreamed of, the pair of them rolling together as one in the back room of the store. He loved the soft yield of her flesh, the perkiness of her firm yet supple breasts. He loved the things she could do with her tongue! And it seemed that Bambi loved Spinner's enthusiasm and hand-eye coordination. Spinner committed every direction she gave him to memory, filing it away for future use.

Confidence can take years to build. Sometimes, confidence must be gained with knowledge and determination. Sometimes, confidence must be built up with the physical body through manual labor. But sometimes, all it takes is bringing a woman to orgasm. All too soon, it was over. They got cleaned up and parted ways as if they had never met, though she told Spinner he was welcome back anytime.

Spinner strutted out of the One-Horned Stag a new man, a tad disheveled but distinctly pleased with himself. There was a greater self-assurance to him than there had ever been, for he was no longer a stranger in the ways of women. After all was said and done, today had been a pretty great day.

At least until a certain _someone_ tried to ruin it again.

"Hey, buddy, just the guy I wanted to see," Lloyd falsely enthused, his lip bruised and split. "Listen, chief, I know we got off on the wrong foot earlier and I wanted to apologize. Are we cool, bro?"

"Lloyd, I think you need some downtime!" Spinner cheerfully called. The spastic gamer took a running leap and punched Lloyd in his left eye. Lloyd's head snapped back from the force of the padded, bandaged fist connecting with his face. He fell, slamming his head against the pavement. Spinner strode off smiling like not a single fuck was given that day.

Lloyd lay on the ground for a few minutes, woozy, before rolling over and pulling himself up onto his knees. His ears were ringing from the impact and a knot was already forming on the back of his skull. Shakily, he got to his feet, using the wall for support as he moved.

"Hey, pal, wait for me," he feebly rasped. Little by little he lurched out of the alley in which the sex shop was located, confused and searching for Spinner. Lloyd had a plan, even if he was too dazed and concussed to carry it out. He would convince Spinner not to play with Tag and Bink, just as he had convinced the others. Whether he had to do it by trickery or violence, he would do it. He would fight down the weakness and nausea that was overtaking him and by God, he would _get it done._

But Lloyd did not know that he was being followed. In his confused state, he did not realize that Tag and Bink were waiting patiently for him to leave the field of view of the Tipsy Roadrunner's security camera. As soon as he was a few feet from the mouth of the alley, Lloyd was grabbed and dragged behind the One-Horned Stag.

"You just couldn't leave him alone," Tag hissed, shoving him forward. Lloyd hit the wall face first, crumpling down to his knees with a groan.

"Why did you have to drive us to this, Lloyd? We asked you time and again to stop your bullying ways," Bink expressed disapprovingly. "We warned you earlier today not to bother Spinner again. We told you before to stop harassing all the other gamers. It's not the other players; it's _your attitude_ that's the problem here. That's why no one wants to play with you, Lloyd. We warned you to quit before things got rough."

"I think we need to warn 'im a little harder, eh, Bink?" Tag snarled.

"Not the face!" Lloyd begged, throwing his arms over his head. Tag and Bink closed in on him…

* * *

><p>Spinner stepped confidently over the threshold of Dragon's Wing Gaming, taking in the smell of snacks, soda, and well-worn monster manuals. The usually spastic gamer stilled, recognizing the music over the store's speakers as the score from <em>Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.<em> At one table were a group of nerds gathered around a deck of Pokemon cards. The shelves in the front of the store were lined with video games, both new and used, and even classic cartridges and platforms for more old school gamers. But from the books, dice, and miniatures that lined the counter, the proprietor was clearly the _oldest_ of old school: a tabletop roleplayer.

"Now all I gotta do is find the big man," he murmured, glancing around.

"The big man's right here. You must be Spinner."

Spinner lived up to his name, spinning around to face the owner of the deep voice and slammed face first into a muscular chest as wide as a barrel, tufts of blonde hair sticking out from the collar of his Hawaiian shirt. As the playful hacker slowly looked up in fear, he realized just how big the thirty-something was; he was easily broader than AJ. Sure, he was not as well-defined as Sherman, but who was? His square face, the bottom half covered by his close cropped moustache and beard, was set in a slight frown. He looked down at Spinner not in disapproval, but as if he was waiting for the elder Cortez to fuck up. His cold blue eyes bore into Spinner, and he knew this was who he was looking for.

"Yes, sir. I'm Spinner Cortez. Sir."

"Strider Drake," he replied, catching Spin's hand in an iron grip. "Welcome to Dragon's Wing Gaming. Tag and Bink said you were inquiring about joining our rpg?"

"They actually asked me to join, sir," he said meekly. "But, yes, sir, it does sound like a lot of fun."

"Stop calling me sir."

"Yes, sir. I mean, Strider."

His blue eyes narrowed. "How much experience do you have roleplaying?"

"Mostly I stick to video games, but my brother and I played a lot of Dungeons & Dragons with friends."

"Fourth edition?"

Spinner scoffed. "Three point five."

Strider murmured, looming over Spinner with suspicious eyes. "Uh huh. And what kind of character were you looking to bring to the party?"

"I was thinking a cleric. No angst-fest backstory, no 'I shall avenge you, mother!' Just a chaotic good human cleric of Corellon Larethian who grew up in a small town and wants to do as much good as possible while seeing the world and having adventures."

The large man regarded Spinner for a minute, circling him as he stroked his beard in thought. "Seems a bit pared down. Most players like to come up with epically badass histories for their characters to make them as cool as possible."

"Well, yeah, but that's so overdone, and it totally highjacks whatever plot the DM's got cooked up, forcing them to center around your own story. It's kind of a dick move." Spinner harumphed. "I had this idea that I'd play a wide-eyed idealist whose story is only beginning. Anyway, I'd think it's preferable to a lawful good Drow."

Strider chuckled. "You heard about that, huh?" he asked good naturedly. "Okay, you pass. Let's get you're cleric rolled up to level five. You got dice?"

"Didn't have a chance to stop at home, actually."

"That's cool, I can lend you some. JUNIOR!"

A little boy of about six or seven popped out from behind a display of Super Mario plush toys, his legionnaire's helmet skewed from the sudden movement. His forest green cape billowed about dramatically as he stood at attention, and Spinner noticed his Hawaiian shirt matched that of the shopkeeper. "Yes, Daddy!" he barked, saluting, looking straight ahead.

"Fetch the spare dice, Junior."

"Kay!" Junior ran off making whooshing noises, his arms high above his head, and came back a few minutes later with a large plastic jar of assorted polyhedral dice…and, oddly enough, three chameleons.

Spinner picked out a handful of dice in varying shades of blue, all with different sides, and got to rolling at the table in the back where he was told the game would take place. Junior kept him company, claiming he was there to make sure Spinner did not cheat, but the entire time he merely babbled excitedly on about cool feats he thought Spinner's character should take and how awesome their adventures would be. Spin thought it was kind of adorable that a six year old should be so knowledgeable about these geeky pursuits, but going by his parents it was only natural.

Once Spin got his character sheet finished and handed it off to Strider for inspection, Junior enthusiastically introduced Spinner to his three chameleons named Paisley, Plaid and Stripes, his father's old tomcat Frosty and kitten Frisbee, and the family iguana, Kitty. Why anyone would name an iguana Kitty was beyond him, but the only answer Junior gave in that regard was "Daddy was thinking about a snake which I think woulda been super cool but Mommy said we could only have pets with legs." Yes, because _that_ made sense.

He continued to humor the child, but after a little make believe he saw a flash of pink out of the corner of his eye. A girl sat down on the other side of the table, lining up her miniatures. Spinner recognized her from the day the Vandals had stopped time. While everyone in town had frozen that day, she had done so in a particularly hilarious manor; she had frozen in the diner angrily throwing pizza at her male companion, who he now realized, thinking back on it, was Lloyd. The elder Cortez felt a pang of guilt; he had laughed when he heard Stanford had turned the pizza around to hit her instead, but now that he knew firsthand what a prick Lloyd Carter was…

Well, if she had problems with Lloyd, she was probably okay. But rules were rules.

"Sorry, Miss," he said politely, "but this table's reserved for a D&D session."

"I know. I never miss it." Once her books and dice were arranged just so, she leaned over on her elbows and smiled. "So, you're the new guy Tag and Bink promised, huh? Those boys never disappoint. I'm Kitty Guildenstern, a.k.a. Peony Merryweather, level five chaotic neutral Halfling Rogue. And you are?"

Spinner wrinkled his nose. "Kitty? But I thought the iguana's name was Kitty."

"Yes, but my name was Kitty _first,"_ she said rolling her eyes. "Are you going to make a joke about it?"

"No, I think I'll hold on that until I've got a good one."

Kitty raised her eyebrows and smiled; this guy was kind of cute. "Really, now? That's a nice change. Usually I hear the same old material. So…?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, me! Sorry. I'm Spinner Cortez, a.k.a. Carlos San Dimas, level four chaotic good Human Cleric of Corellon Larethian. I'll be here regularly if Strider gives the go ahead."

"I think at this point he'd give the go ahead to **anyone** but Lloyd. Big jerk…"

"Tell me about it. Jackass tried to mug me."

"That crazy sonuvabitch! Did he hurt you?"

"Yeah, he hit my fist with his face real hard," he said smugly, raising his bandaged hand. "But by the time he tried it again, the giant guy at Lucky Panda had showed me how to do it better, and I knocked his ass out a second time."

"Yeah, Po Xiang Mao's awesome. He runs a great establishment."

And on that note, Kitty giggled coquettishly and proceeded to tell stories about the things Lloyd had done to get himself declared a walking cancer. Sure, he had made lewd comments to her; of course he had insulted Tag and Bink on numerous occasions. But apparently the final straw had been when he spilled Red Bull™ on Strider's new kitten, and most likely on purpose. Frisbee's subsequent illness had prompted an investigation for animal cruelty and the Drake family had been hounded for quite some time. This new information only made Spinner feel even more vindicated in punching out that colossal dickcheese, and his good mood could only get better.

"Hey, hey, hey! The gang's all here!" Tag called triumphantly as he and Bink made their way to the table. "We got ten minutes to spare. See, Bink, I told ya we'd be back in time! You lovebirds ready to play?"

"They'd better be," Strider intoned, his voice as ominous as an ancient being from beyond. "Exodius has plans for you, young adventurers…"

* * *

><p>What a night!<p>

Spinner had not expected the game to go on for so long, but he was far from complaining; he had a wonderful time. He had hardly even realized how stressed he was getting; all cooped up at the hub, no social life beyond his battle companions—but even though he was exhausted, he felt so refreshed! By the time he stumbled out of the elevator and into the secret underground base—ha! He never got tired of that—it was nearly two in the morning. He whistled the main theme from _Legend of Zelda_ and lazily kicked off his shoes so as to sneak down to bed.

Then the lights flipped on, far too bright for someone who had spent the last six hours in a dim back room with three guys, a girl, fresh 'za and Harry Potter theme music. Sherman stood there, still dressed. His shoes were still on, his keys were in his hands, and his eyes were noticeably bloodshot; he had been ready to go out looking for Spinner. And he did not look happy. No, not at all.

"Sherman, little buddy…"

Spinner was cut off as big, strong arms wrapped around him, lifting him off his feet.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you!" the younger Cortez whined. "Please, don't scare me like that again! Why did you turn off your tracking beacon? Why didn't you answer my calls? I didn't know where you were! I was worried! Where have you been all night?"

"Bro, shh, it's all right, I'm fine." The usually spastic gamer was calm now, patting this muscular genius on the back to soothe him. "I'm sorry, too, Sherm. I didn't mean to scare you. I just got upset, is all, and I just needed some time to myself. I think you did, too." He chuckled. "Hell, I think everyone needed time away from me. I know how bad I can get."

"But you promise you're okay? Are we cool?"

"Bro, we are downright groovy!" He laughed good-naturedly, ruffling his brother's hair as he was lowered gently to his feet.

The brothers Cortez walked to the kitchen for a quick snack before bed. There they found their intrepid leader in his bathrobe with a glass of milk.

Vert yawned and rubbed his bleary eyes. "Hey fellas. 'Sup?"

Spinner's expression became grim. He had been having so much fun he forgot about his message. Well, a promise was a promise, and the pentacle around his neck was proof enough that he had made that promise.

"Hey, Vert. Listen, when I was in town today I saw this old woman and she said she wanted to talk to you. She said she knew your mother."

Sherman frowned in sympathy. Like all of Vert's friends at the hub, he thought Mrs. Wheeler was dead. Two of the three young men in the kitchen knew she was not, but out of respect, Spinner did not mention this.

"She give you a name?"

"Maria Wise Raven."

Vert frowned, furrowing his eyebrows. "Yeah. Yeah, thanks for passing that along. G'night, guys."

"Good night," Spinner called. He and his brother continued down to their quarters. "So, what did you do today?"

"Oh, mostly worked in the lab…until I got too worried about you and went a little stir crazy. Tezz kicked me out, said AJ'd be a better assistant. Can you imagine that? AJ? Don't get me wrong, he's a nice guy, but he's dumb as a sack of hammers. The indignity of it all!" Sherman sighed. "Sorry, ranting. How about you, Spin? How was your day?"

Spinner smiled a secretive, knowing kind of smile. "Oh, it was all right, I guess. Nothing special…"


End file.
